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What Makes Your Full Evaluations Different From Others?

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A parent asked me a couple of good questions which were, “Don’t psychologist all use the same tests?  What makes your testing different?”  There are a hundred plus psychological tests so psychologists don’t always use the same tests, nor should they.  An inexperienced psychologist will always use the same tests regardless of the issue but this often leaves parents wondering because the parents’ questions were not answered.

For each individual I work with I use a different set of tests that is individualized to make sure to answer the parent’s most important question(s).   Since I specialize in school neuropsychology, ADHD, and dyslexia, I can use tests that many school psychologists have not been trained to administer.   These tests provide greater information than the ‘average’  test.

My philosophy is to try and add value and knowledge to your situation by doing the best job I can.  One tidbit that sets me apart from most private practitioners is that, with your permission, I’ll talk to your child’s teacher on the phone to get his/ her perspective.  Most psychologists won’t do that because it takes them additional time and many believe time is money.   I’ve been a classroom teacher so I understand the importance of getting the teacher’s perspective.  After all, the teacher is spending considerable time with your child and the issue is usually occurring at school.  You don’t get the big picture without talking to the teacher.  I want the big picture of what the parent sees, teacher reports, my direct work with the child, and my intuition.  This way all bases are covered.   This is just one of the many ways my testing differs from others.  Call me and I’ll discuss more with you.

25 Ways to Help Your Teen with ADHD

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Some teens struggle socially and teens with ADHD must have good people skills in order to live life to the fullest.  After all, building relationships is one of our primary functions as a human being.  In order to help your teen I recommend using the book 25 Ways to Win With People, by Drs. John C. Maxwell and Les Parrott.  It’s packed with practical ways to build relationships.  The writing is readable and not at dense or technical. It includes many stories to illustrate the 25 key points.  And the book is small.  It won’t overwhelm teens that are immediately turned off by thick, textbook-style volumes.  I encourage parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and important adult friends to read the book ahead of time, or together with the teen. This allows for important common grounding. In other words, everyone has the same information. That opens the way for discussion and shared experiences or ideas. How might your family work this valuable book into your routine? There are two ways you might do so:

Save this book for summer reading, when the academic demands of school lessen.  Read the book in advance, and let your son know that over the summer he’ll be reading an excellent and potentially life-changing book called 25 Ways to Win With People. For the first 25 weekdays of summer, he’ll read a chapter a day. Reassure him/her – the chapters average less than seven pages. It will take five weeks to complete the book. Each day, you’ll ask him/her to write a short summary of the key point and discuss it with you.  Role-playing is another effective practice tool. You can practice these new skills within the supportive context of your home, where he/she shouldn’t be as self- conscious as he/she might in public. 

 Make learning and applying the 25 points a family project. Together, the family agrees to read one chapter per week. Some parents set aside part of the day on Saturday or Sunday to have a short talk about the key point. For the entire week each family member works on applying the step. Family members practice with each other as well as out in their school, work, or daily activities. If the family has dinner together, they should talk about their experiences.  

Even though a new point is introduced each week, it’s important to keep in mind that earlier points don’t get discarded. Apply them as much as possible, especially if there are one or two you have found highly useful. This is what I call the “rent to own” philosophy.  We are teaching our teenagers to try the point out (or rent it) for a week.  If he/she finds it useful, he continues to rent it and use it. At some point your teen may decide that this point is so helpful that they’ll decide to own it and apply it on their own, because he/she has recognized its value in his/her life. 

 Think about your family and decide which way would work best for you.  Your teen will soon have 25 ways to become more successful with people.

Holding Kids Back

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It is the time of year when parents and/or school personnel consider retaining a small percentage of children to complete another year in the same grade.  The argument that parents often hear is something like, “Mark is immature and lagging academically behind his peers so another year would allow him to catch-up and boost his confidence because he’ll do much better with the curriculum a second time.”  In most cases, I disagree.  If your child is average or only has a learning disability, ask yourself the question, “What will be drastically different in the academic curriculum that makes you think Mark will need another year?”  The answer is “probably not very much.”  A second time will not solve most problems.  Major research studies indicate that retention (regardless of grade) is associated with later high school drop out, lower levels of academic achievement in the 11th grade, and decreased self-esteem.  It’s cited that children perceive retention as one of the most stressful events they could experience (see my www.wrightslaw.com for references). 

If your child is doing so poorly that the school is considering retention, have a thorough psychoeducational evaluation completed as soon as possible.  The evaluation provides answers so you don’t use a hit and miss approach for helping your child.  An evaluation should be thorough and information should be gathered from parents, teachers, the child, and others.  At minimum, a licensed school psychologist’s evaluation should include intelligence, academic, self-esteem, and information processing tests.  Parents should receive a through, in person, follow-up explanation of results with specific recommendations in a written report.  A psychoeducational evaluation is the main way to identify your child’s strengths and weaknesses to form an appropriate action plan.  The plan is used so parents and school personnel can work together to improve your child’s performance without retention.

Change Your Child’s Mindset

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Everyone is talking!  We are usually talking out loud to someone or talking to ourselves.  When we talk in our mind this is called self or inner-talk.  Inner-talk is important because it is how we think about, conceptualize, and solve many of our daily problems.  It is important to teach children to develop positive inner talk because it is related to our self-esteem.  If our inner talk is mostly negative, then we start to believe it and feel negative about ourselves.  Positive inner talk leads to positive actions.  Think about how many times a day you say positive versus negative thoughts to yourself.  What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror?

Think about your child in school.  Do you think he or she says positive statements such as: “School is OK. I’ll give it my best shot.  I can do well on this quiz because I studied.”   If your child is not using positive inner-talk then she is less likely to perform well in school or in other areas of life such as playing sports.  I use an analogy that goes like this with my son when he is thinking negatively.  I say, “Tommy’ when you get up to bat in baseball do you tell yourself you’ll strike out or get a hit?  Right, you tell yourself you’ll get a hit.  So now when you are doing this homework are you telling yourself you can try to get it done or that you just hate homework?”  Next we discuss how he can perform better with a positive mind set and thought process.

Parents need to show children how we use positive inner-talk during everyday events.  The next time you are preparing for an event such as a job interview, client presentation, sport event, or trying on a pair of jeans, explain your thoughts.  Give your child some insight into your thinking by talking about your thoughts aloud.  Teach your child to believe in him or herself and they will start to perform better in school and life.  A sudden drop in school performance can be related to self esteem or motivation problems.  Your child may believe that no matter how hard they try, they will fail.  I can help you with this.