These are ‘hot’ topics of interest

Stop Yelling at Your Child

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“Here we go again, mom’s rocket launcher went off and she’s yelling at me.” This statement captures how kids I work with often describe how their mom or dad deals with them when they are not acting right.  “Yelling is the only way I can get him to listen and behave,” is a common parent response.  All agree, yelling does not contribute to a peaceful home.

Yes, at times we parents must raise our voices and make it stern and serious. But yelling, shouting, screaming, and threatening is parenting by instilling fear into your child.  Unfortunately, fear and intimidation don’t produce lasting behavioral changes. Sure, your child might behave when you’re around but leave them with relatives or a sitter and prepare yourself for a bad report.  When you yell at your child to get him to do what you want, he is also learning that’s how he should treat his peers when he encounters someone who doesn’t do what he wants.  You are the example he looks to for learning how to interact with others.

Alternatives to Yelling

Do you yell at your child when he asks you to read an unknown word from his homework?  No, you teach him how to pronounce the word. Try to maintain this teaching mindset when it comes to his behavior.  Keep teach him over and over how to behave appropriately.  Perhaps you’ve thought, “Why does he act like that? Maybe there is something wrong with him. Is he autistic?”  Our testing process provides information to help answer your questions.

What?

Perhaps ask him questions instead of yelling commands. “Are you being helpful? Is this good for the family?  What will happen if you don’t stop?”  People tune out yelling but a question has an implied response requirement.  Being asked a question requires reflection and thought.  This helps your child’s mind to shift and transition. Parenting requires us to modify our behavior just like modifying our child’s behavior so keep learning and practicing.

Need Help?

Call to discuss your child as we test for autism, dyslexia, dysgraphia, ADHD, depression, learning disabilities, and anxiety.  Dial (561) 625 4125.

School Shouldn’t Be This Difficult

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“I hate school. School is like jail for kids.” Margaret’s son’s reaction captured how many boys perceive school. It can be a battle to get your child to school and a battle to get homework completed.  Many parents feel embattled by emails, texts, or phone calls about your child’s behavior or effort.  Learning is a slow process and your child’s behind.  Many parents come to us for school neuropsychological testing seeking answers because they realize school should not be this difficult.

It’s Not Laziness

Children struggle in school for various reasons and for adolescent boys I often hear, “He is just lazy and unmotivated.”  Many times our testing reveals a hidden learning disability and that your son is feeling inadequate.  When a boy does not feel good enough or that he can meet the academic requirement, he can’t work to his potential. Thus, he is not lazy but feeling inadequate and believes, “Why try?”  The good news is this can be changed with proper support at school and home.

15-20% of Children Struggle

According to the National Center for Educational Statistics, 15-20% of public-school students in the United States receive special education services. In Florida, 15% of public school students have an Individual Education Program (IEP). Thirty-three percent of special education students have a specific learning disability. Your child needs tested to receive public school help.  Public schools offer this but with many hurdles and a lengthy wait time.  We offer a more thorough evaluation and give you written results in two weeks or less.

Seek Support

Trust your parental instinct and seek additional understanding. A wait and see approach often delays getting your child the proper help and support. Tutoring, counseling, an IEP, or 504 Plan is often needed to start closing gaps and increasing independence and confidence.  The state of Florida provides money to help you offset these expenses. To learn more search Family Empowerment Scholarship Unique Abilities.

Call to discuss your child as we test for autism, dyslexia, dysgraphia, ADHD, depression, learning disabilities, and anxiety (561) 625 4125.

Reading Time With Dad: The Father-Child Relationship

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James and the Giant Peach and Danny, Champion of the World were two of Ronald Dhal’s books my dad read with me when I was in elementary school. Some of my fondest childhood memories were reading these books with my dad. We did other things together like playing basketball, going fishing, and riding bikes but the relational connection of sitting next to my dad on the couch and feeling his presence and love was strong and evident. Dad gave me his precious gift of time.

The father-child relationship is powerful and creates a foundation for your child’s psyche to develop. Will your child feel loved and affirmed or rejected and ignored by dad? As a school psychologist and dad, I get it. Dads are busy. Dads might believe they don’t have the nurturing instinct that mom holds. They are busy providing for their family. Parenting expert, Meg Meeker, M.D., says, “After 30 years in my medical practice and extensive research, I see one common thread in children of all ages: the direct correlation between a father’s presence and a child’s well-being.”

If you are a dad reading this, it’s not meant to guilt you. Whether you’ve messed up or think it’s too late, your child of any age still needs you. They don’t need perfection; they need your presence and affirmation. Start small. Perhaps for you it’s asking them more thoughtful questions, taking a genuine interest in them telling you about a favorite video game, or watching a funny video together. For other dads it is telling your child what every child wants to hear: you love them and are proud of them.

Parenting is an on the job learning experience. Here are a few resources to help you along the way: Meg Meeker’s book Strong Father’s, Strong Daughters, Robert Lewis’ book Raising A Modern Day Knight or John C. Maxwell’s book Intentional Living, are thoughtful books to help dads along their parenting journey. Check out AllProDad.com or Christ in the Smokies. Dad, you got this.

Call or text to discuss your child as we test for autism, dyslexia, dysgraphia, ADHD, depression, and anxiety. (561) 625 4125

Inflexible Children Struggle

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Inflexible children struggle. “We don’t spring any unexpected changes on him or he has a huge meltdown,” explained one mom.  Her eight-year-old son had daily tantrums when things did not go his way.  Mom was concerned he might have ADHD so we evaluated him to determine the root cause of his meltdowns. Our evaluation showed it was not ADHD but rather he had executive functioning difficulty with shifting attention and cognitive flexibility.

One Track Mind

Perhaps you’ve heard the saying, “That person has a one-track mind.” That saying captures what happens when inflexible people get something stuck in their minds and they can’t get it out.  They perseverate.  Their brain is like a train riding down a track and it can’t make a shift to a new track until it gets to a junction.  Unfortunately for some people, their brain goes on for ‘miles’ before it reaches a junction.  As a parent you might think, “Just get over it and move on” but it is not that easy for your child.

Transition Difficulty

Inflexible children often have difficulty making transitions at home and at school.  They often see things their way and have difficulty going with the flow.  This contributes to their melt downs and stubbornness. Inflexible children are not always pleasant to be around.  They can be bossy when playing and want to do things their way.  This inflexibility can create friendship issues with same age peers and inflexible children might prefer to play with younger children whom they can boss around.

Executive Functioning

The term executive functioning describes our brain’s management system.  Kids with executive functioning difficulty need to learn skills rather than take pills to help them.  Mom was happy medication was not the answer for her child. “My Day is Ruined!: A Story Teaching Flexible Thinking” by Bryan Smith is a book you can read with your child to teach skills.

 Call (561) 625 4125 to discuss your child as we test for executive functioning difficulty, autism, dyslexia, ADHD, and more.

We Offer Autism Testing

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We offer autism testing because across our great nation, autism diagnoses continue to increase. According to results from a recent CDC funded study, the autism prevalence was that 1 in 36 children had autism. For every one girl identified with autism, four boys were identified. For the first time, more African-American, Hispanic, and Asian children were identified than White children.  Researchers agree that early identification and use of evidenced based treatments lead to the best outcomes for children with autism.

We test children for autism starting at age 2.  There is no one test or even a medical test or blood test to diagnose autism.  In our practice we utilize the gold standard assessment called the Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule or ADOS, second edition.  In addition, we use caregiver interviews and tests of language, attention, intelligence, and memory.

Autism Diagnostic Criteria

Five criteria should be met for a psychologist to diagnose Autism Spectrum Disorder. First, the child must demonstrate deficits in social communication and social interaction across settings. Second, the child must display restricted, repetitive patterns of behavior, interests, or activities, currently or by history. Third, the child’s symptoms must have started early. Fourth, there must be evidence of a significant impairment. Fifth, the symptoms must not be caused by another mental or physical condition.

Evidence Based Autism Treatment

If your child is diagnosed with autism, we recommend you start with treatments identified by the National Clearinghouse on Autism Evidence and Practice. These are 28 evidenced based practices that independent research documented best help children with autism.  Treatments include ABA therapy, discrete trial training, cognitive behavioral intervention, and social narratives.  Many insurance companies pay for evidenced based therapies with an official autism diagnosis. In addition, Florida offers the Family Empowerment Scholarship to provide you funding to help your child.

Autism Support for Parents

I co-authored the book “Parent’s Quick Start Guide to Autism” which provides a quick, but deep dive into what to immediately do when your child is diagnosed with autism.  When it comes to helping your young child, time is too precious to squander.

 Call (561) 625 4125 to discuss your child as we test for autism, dyslexia, dysgraphia, ADHD, depression, and anxiety.