Change Your Child’s Mindset
Everyone is talking! We are usually talking out loud to someone or talking to ourselves. When we talk in our mind this is called self or inner-talk. Inner-talk is important because it is how we think about, conceptualize, and solve many of our daily problems. It is important to teach children to develop positive inner talk because it is related to our self-esteem. If our inner talk is mostly negative, then we start to believe it and feel negative about ourselves. Positive inner talk leads to positive actions. Think about how many times a day you say positive versus negative thoughts to yourself. What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror?
Think about your child in school. Do you think he or she says positive statements such as: “School is OK. I’ll give it my best shot. I can do well on this quiz because I studied.” If your child is not using positive inner-talk then she is less likely to perform well in school or in other areas of life such as playing sports. I use an analogy that goes like this with my son when he is thinking negatively. I say, “Tommy’ when you get up to bat in baseball do you tell yourself you’ll strike out or get a hit? Right, you tell yourself you’ll get a hit. So now when you are doing this homework are you telling yourself you can try to get it done or that you just hate homework?” Next we discuss how he can perform better with a positive mind set and thought process.
Parents need to show children how we use positive inner-talk during everyday events. The next time you are preparing for an event such as a job interview, client presentation, sport event, or trying on a pair of jeans, explain your thoughts. Give your child some insight into your thinking by talking about your thoughts aloud. Teach your child to believe in him or herself and they will start to perform better in school and life. A sudden drop in school performance can be related to self esteem or motivation problems. Your child may believe that no matter how hard they try, they will fail. I can help you with this.